My Book

In her debut book, journalist and self-professed ‘happy virgin’ Arleen Spenceley offers a mature, funny, and relatable vision of Catholic teaching on chastity for young adults. Chastity is For Lovers provides perspective on a variety of topics — the difference between chastity and abstinence, how virginity is an affirming and valuable life choice, how the word “purity” can be harmful in ministry settings, how to date well, and why sexual self control is the best form of marriage preparation — and gives single adults the best possible chance to find true love. She carefully avoids using language that shames readers and instead presents a view of chastity that is joyful and positive. A free, downloadable leader’s guide will be available for those ministering to groups of young adults. | Ave Maria Press

The Story Behind the Book

On Feb. 28, 2013 — the last day of Pope Benedict’s papacy — I sat at the kitchen table, typing grateful Tweets to the pope and waiting to receive news that would make or break my day (and potentially change my life).

In Notre Dame, Indiana, 1100 miles north of my house, the people gathered who would determine which kind of news I’d get. They discussed, deliberated, and decided, all from a room at a publishing house called Ave Maria Press. After the meeting, an editor delivered the news to me like this:

“So,” he said. “How would you like to write a book for us?”

I SAID YES.

I said yes because they (the fabulous people at Ave Maria Press) said yes, too. They had gathered that day to review a book proposal I had written, and to decide whether they’d like me to write the book. Indeed they would, and indeed I did. The book — about what it’s like to practice chastity in a culture that says I shouldn’t — goes on sale Nov. 28, 2014.